Feed the GOAT (just don't feed him drugs)

 506 days.

That's how long it's been since I last felt compelled to write anything here.

It's probably down to the Pandemic and the absence of a Euro 2020 tournament. But nothing has inspired me to take to the keyboard in anger (or jest, love, sadness), nothing in the last topsy turvy 506 days. Nothing until now.

I recently stated on Twitter that Diego Maradona was my favourite footballer of all time, joint with Ronaldo, the real (Brazilian) one for you youngsters. But in my opinion he stands alone when ability is to be considered.

In this YouTube, FIFA Ultimate Team, Champions League, Premier League age so many are tempted into writing off what they has come before the present. That is largely because we have been blessed with two of the best footballers to have graced the modern game, with careers that have run in parallel and various cheerleaders from either side of the manufactured hyperbole that accompanies modern day football.

Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo are, were, great but Maradona was something else.

To understand Diego's powers you first need to take yourself back and unlearn all of the last 40 or so years of football. For a start Napoli and Argentina were not the powerhouses they are now considered by many of the game's fans. The former have won Serie A only twice, under Diego's stewardship, and only really come close once since then a few years back powered by Maurizio Sarri and another Argentinian Gonzalo Higuian (King of the Bottlers).

Argentina, in spite of their record breaking success in the Copa America, had failed to amount to anything on the World stage at the point at which Maradona came to prominence. A berth in the very first World Cup final was followed by 48 years of abject failures, peaking with them watching the often lauded, technicolour, 1970 tournament at home, while their rivals from across the continent Brazil swept all before them.

Yes Diego didn't actually make the squad in 1978, much to the disgust of many, but it could be argued that the 17 year old, who had been playing in the domestic championship for the last two and a half years, had already started to have a positive influence on the nation in the grip of a military dictatorship.

Many Argentine detractors will probably point to the 78 tournament, held on their home patch, a question the Victor's legitimacy. A defeat in the first round, dodgy Peruvian performances with the hosts knowing how many goals were needed to make the final and sh*thosuery in the final against a Cruyffless Netherlands side help to make their case.

Enter Diego.

In 79 he tore the World Youth Cup a "new one" as Argentina swept all before them. In 82 he was supposed to carry them to glory but the then 21 year old Maradona was probably slightly too young to be able to influence a decent but hardly spectacular side that much (plus there was a lot going on off the field, the Faulklands and all that).

And then we have 1986. Mexico 86 will always be heralded as the peak of his career. Despite that what is often forgotten is how influential Diego was. We look at Champions, especially World Champions through the window, of hindsight. Almost assuming that their eventual victory was a given or a that they were "shoe-in" for the title. I feel like people are guilty of doing this with the 2002 Brazil side that lost embarrassingly to Honduras 12 months before the World Cup in Korea/Japan and the  Italian side emerging from the Calciopoli scandal.

The same is done with Maradona's Argentina in 1986, we forget that they struggled in qualification, that there were questions over whether he should have been captain, that the press at home had been so scathing of the national team in the build-up to the tournament that the players made up insulting songs about them that they sung after victories in the later stages of the tournament.

We forget that Maradona, who was not a forward by any means, top scored for his country with 5 goals at least 3 of them being solo efforts most professionals would dream of scoring. That he eventually would go on to assist the winner in the final, despite being closely man-marked by West German great Lothar Matthaus for the entire game. We as English fans forget that we actually spent 90 minutes kicking lumps out of the guy, committing fouls that would probably nowadays see us ending the game with about 8 players. But of course, "(he) was the cheat".

And around that  goal we often forget the baiting done by our press over the Faulklands war, the Faulklands being another legacy of out imperialist past that we don't want to properly acknowledge (I'm not going to get into that here, that's for Twitter! ;-)); and how that probably would have made it even less likely for the average Argentinian to feel too bad about The Hand of God (what the hell was Shilton doing though?!? How did he get out-jumped?).

I know one of the things we don't forget, that's his second goal. Dubbed "Goal of The Century", it may well have been the finest demonstration of power, speed, close control and composure, although you could argue that it was one of the best seen as he did it again against Belgium in the next game just to prove it was no fluke.

Mexico 86 is Diego Maradona, nobody has every before or since taken a major international tournament by the scruff of the neck like that, and nobody will.

Before this turns into a complete World Cup 1986 "love in", we should also go back and consider Diego's influence in club football. We often hear tired "Could he do it on a wet Wednesday night in Stoke/Burnley?", "Could [Insert World Class Foreign player] cope with the intensity of the Premier League clichés (one of these days I'll properly get into that); well Diego could.

He played on bogs, none of this Groundsman of the Year nonsense; against the best players and clubs in the World at the time; constantly being hacked like in the England game (just watch what my beloved Athletic do to him in 1983) with no protection from the referees; winning Serie A (twice) and the UEFA Cup, when it was a valued competition and there was no seeding to keep you away from the big boys until the later stages.

And all of this happened while he was off his head on cocaine (while the man definitely took drugs there was no evidence of them ever being the performance enhancing type, if anything they should have been performance reducing), being adored/harassed by fans of his club and country at a level many have never experienced (and that those who have have often struggled to cope with) and mixing with the Camorra.

So now there's his legacy. Diego is the sole reason the Argentine Number 10s are so revered. I'd go as far as saying he pioneered that role and inspired others to emulate him. The likes of Ortega, Aimar, Riquelme and Messi all have had a touch of Maradona in them. The Argentine national team is yet to win a major Men's international tournament since Diego's retirement and have only made the last four of the World Cup once (2014) in this time (they achieved this in 3 of the 5 tournaments during his career).

And Napoli have never quite hit the heights of those heady days in the later half of the 1980's. As previously stated there was one serious title challenge, were they managed to get 93 points yet still come second to Juventus; but barring a couple of Copa Italia's it's been a testing 30 or so years since the little man left Italy (under a cloud of unpaid taxes and a failed drug test, of course!).

All in all you have to say what a guy! To coin a phrase used by Barry Davies during the commentary on the Goal of The Century, "There is no debate about" the fact he should be considered the greatest to have played our beautiful game! Leo Messi isn't fit to lace his boots!*

PS he also played Italia 90 with a not fully healed, formerly broken ankle, taking painkillers before each match, the guy had some balls.

*Leo Messi is a wonderful footballer, one of the true greats of the game, this disrespect is purely for effect (but he will never be as good in my eyes).

Diego Armando Maradona and the World Cup - 10 Things

He's my second favourite player of all time just ahead of Alessandro Del Piero and behind the Ronaldo (not that Portuguese guy). It's pretty impossible not synonamise Diego Maradona with the World Cup and Argentina's performances in the competition; whether it be from the perspective of a prodigious youngster not taken to the tournament, an influential captain dragging them through, or a past it lunatic ranting at another failed campaign. In a World Cup context we've been aware of Maradona's presence for 40 years now.

"So what are the ten things you remember of Maradona from the World Cup Travis?" I hear you ask. Well...

1. Squaring up to the whole Belgian defence in 1982
It's since been debunked as a trick of the camera. If you've not seen it before, this is basically an image of Maradona, ball at his feet, with 6 Belgians (in that wonderful Belgium 1982 kit) in his way, poised to go on another one of those runs.

What's actually happened is that the ball has dropped to his feet from a free kick on the edge of the box, hence everyone is behind the ball. I'm not even sure anything came of that particular situation, but because of his heroics 4 years later we've created this fantasy of him running through the scared Belgians. The reality is that Maradona and Argentina were thoroughly disappointing both in that game and in Spain in 1982.

2. Kung-fu kicking that Brazilian dude
As said in memory number 1, Maradona and Argentina were disappointing in 1982, Messi-like if you will ("shots fired"). After creeping out of their first round group they found themselves in a second group with perennial World Cup powerhouses Brazil and Italy.

Needless to say an Argentina pre the mystique created in 1986 were no match for either and Maradona was singled out for some "Special" treatment by both sides. Once the defending champions were 3-0 down and already eliminated from the tournament Maradona decided to exact his revenge in the only way he knew how...

3. That ball for Caniggia against Brazil
By 1990 Maradona was a fully bona-fide World Cup legend but, unfortunately for him, Argentina were a spent force. They would go on to reach the final under his steam, with Maradona's highlight of the tournament being a move where he rolled back the years showing the strength to hold off two Brazilian defenders, while threading the most irresistible through ball for Cannigia to run on to and round Taffarel. Ouuff!!

4. The terrible penalty against Yugoslavia
By 1990 the sheen was starting to fade on our legend. Sure he was still capable of producing moments like that ball against Brazil, but Maradona was carrying a bit of weight and was most certainly not capable of performing the same heroics as he'd done 4 years earlier in the Mexican heat. If ever there was evidence of his mortality it would be his pitiful penalty in the shootout with Yugoslavia. It's almost as if he thought he'd score just because he was "Maradona". Luckily Goyacachea was on hand to bail him out with a string of saves that set up a semifinal showdown with the hosts Italy.

5. Trying to turn Naples against Italy
It was a bold move! But nothing was considered too bold by Diego.

"Neapolitans you shouldn’t forget that in Italy they do not consider you to be Italians. The country comes and asks for your support for just one day of the year, and for the other 364 they’ll call you Africans."

It almost worked, according to some sources there were pockets of the crowd who weren't as hostile to their Argentinian visitors. Ultimately the battle was won anyway, Italy conceded their first goal of the tournament and subsequently lost the penalty shootout at the end of the game, this time Maradona taking his spot kick a little more seriously.

6. That goal against Greece
I remember rushing home from school to see this one and I wasn't disappointed. Argentina put Greece to the sword with Batistuta scoring a hattrick. But Diego stole the show with a thunderous left foot drive into the top corner, followed by that celebration where he looked possessed. There was still life left in the old dog!

7. His performance against Nigeria
I feel like Maradona doesn't get much credit for this performance, maybe that's because he subsequently failed a drug test at the end of the game. But his influence on the team, now aged 33, should not be downplayed. Especially in the group match against Nigeria. Argentina found themselves a goal down against an exciting attacking side that would beat them 2 years later on the way to winning the Olympics.

Then up steps Diego. First he's involved in an inventive free kick that the Nigerian goalkeeper spills enabling the equaliser. Then he plays a perfectly weighted quick free kick into the path of his old pal Caniggia to set up the winner. While it was then discovered that he'd failed a drugs test, it can be argued no performance enhancing drug can help you have that awareness or deft of touch to be able to play that killer ball for Caniggia, so this is going down as another display of genius for me.

8. Sitting in the stands like a spectre hanging over the modern day team
In my opinion Argentina have never gotten over Maradona leaving the side. Its no coincidence that they haven't won a major international competition since 1993 i.e. In the post-Maradona era. There's the whole "New Maradona" thing but I also think that the very fact that he can often be found somewhere in the ground during modern day Argentina World Cup matches (even in the dugout for a brief unsuccessful spell) has a negative effect on the team.

While he is quick to praise and celebrate, I can never forget the camera panning to him as he did that weird thing with his hands after that goal against Serbia (and Montenegro?) in 2006, Diego always has to chuck in his two cents when things aren't going so well. I'm sure we'll see him again this year.

1986
Right I've purposely left this bit, the best bit, for the end. Mexico 86 is Diego Maradona! It's where the legend is born. Where he cemented his place as the best ever, in my opinion (and many others).

9. Mexico 86 outside of the England game
Before we get into that game I think a point needs to be made of his other performances on, and off, the field in this tournament. In the group phase Maradona shows glimpses of what is to come in the game against South Korea; as do the Koreans who kick lumps out of him at every opportunity.

Against Belgium, probably still on a high from the England Quarter Final, he scores two great goals, one another mazy solo dribble with an explosive finish.

It's always said that Maradona was quiet in the final, as the West Germans had deployed Matthäus to man mark him for the whole game. But he still gets enough time and space to play the perfectly weighted through ball that enables Burochaga to score the match winning goal. So not that quiet then.

Aside from all this though. One of my favourite clips of Maradona in 1986 isn't actually of him playing football. As I said earlier Mexico 86 was his tournament both on and off the field. And we get to see how much of a bond he has with his team mates, as their captain too, when Maradona leads the dressing rooms in a rendition of...

"Argentina's going to be Champions! 
We dedicate this to you all, even the f***ing whores who gave birth to you."

An adapted song from the terraces. Aimed at the journalists back home who had slammed the team after an indifferent qualification campaign.

Expletives aside, I've always pointed to this clip as one of the fundamental things that separates Diego from Lionel Messi, who is as technically gifted as Maradona, but is often described as aloof and out of touch with the people of Argentina. In my opinion as a captain you win with the team, lose with the team and sing with it!

10. England
This is probably the first thing that sprang to mind when you read the title of this blog post. Maradona is both famous and infamous for the role he played in the Quarter Final against England.

If you've been living under a rock, or aren't English (and have been living behind a rock) you may not have heard about Maradona's contraversial Hand Of God goal, which often leads us in England to dismiss him as a cheat and gloss over his achievements when considering him up against the other greats in the history of the game.

Here's the thing though we, well not you and I, Terry Fenwick (unless Terry Fenwick is reading this, in that case you) spent the whole game kicking Maradona up in the air every time he got a sniff of the ball. We were no angels.

Also even the move for the illegal goal was brilliant. There's a little one two between Maradona and a team mate and then the ball is ricocheted up into the box and even then Diego has no right to win the ball. Even with his hand. Or with his hand close to his head, thus giving the impression he'd actually headed the ball in. Where was Shilton?

OK so you're not buying that because you're too hurt to forgive him even after 32 years, but you have to accept that the second goal is testament to the man's genius. Maradona spins away from Hoddle deep in his own half and then 20 seconds later he's rolled the ball in after going round Shilton. The goal gives me goosebumps every time I see it. It's just outstanding!

For me Maradona will always be a devisive character, a true example of a flawed genius. Whether you remember him for being the size of a house until he got his stomach stapled, hosting bizarre chat shows, ball juggling warm-ups, being led away to that infamous drugs test holding the nurse's hand (?!?) or being that kid in the grainy black and white footage scoring goals for Argentinos Junios against fully grown adults, it cannot be denied that he has made a lasting (and generally positive) impression on the World Cup.

Thanks Diego, I understand you!

ANNOUNCE! Part II - "It was better in my day" - The changing face of the FIFA World Cup

I'd kind of thought about doing something like this for a while, then came yesterday's announcement of the England squad.

Quite often I hark back to a simpler time, either on here or on twitter (*cough* @ntrav99), when football was less commercially savy. When games kicked off at 3pm on a Saturday. When drawn matches went to replays and managers tried to win every competition that they were in; and the main prize wasn't qualifying for a competition that you have no hope of winning, just because of what it did to your bank balance. A time when we rarely knew who owned clubs let alone, who was heading up their "Commercial Strategy"; when the only sponsor that could be seen was the one across the team's chest (who the f*ck sponsors a training kit?!) and Barcelona didn't even have one!

I'm not the only person who has these nostalgic views (I think all the above is bad by the way), in my quest for World Cup related material in the run up to this year's tournament, the irony being that most of this stuff wouldn't have been around back in the day when things were "better", I've heard many a well respected journalist refer to an age where we went into tournaments not knowing any of the players. Being surprised when that Hagi that you'd heard of, but never seen beyond a 20 second clip of him in qualifying, actually turned out to be the real deal.

For me it's kind of a phenomenon that is at odds with itself. I love the fact that nowadays there are so many media sources where I can read about a watch previous World Cup tournaments, but then I do think that life, or should I say the tournament, was probably more interesting and definitely more innocent when you had next to nothing going into it. In the past the World Cup created it's own interest, it didn't need to be slick or well presented to thrive. There was no goal music in the stadium or television cameras that spiral zoomed into the centre circle seconds before kick off.

I suppose there needs to be a balance in terms of the polish. There must be some. I definitely don't want completely to go back in the direction of the early tournaments in terms of presentation. You had 1950, which could have actually been held in 1949 (what?) and consisted of a number of lop sided groups, some with as few as two teams, others with a full compliment of four. You've also got 1954 where the teams didn't even all play eachother in the group phase? The 2 seeds played the 2 "Minows" and that was it.

We also have the 1974, 78 & 82 where FIFA decided to do away with a knock out phase and have a 2nd round of group games?! Although I suppose it meant no penalty shootouts (except for France v Germany in 82). It says a lot about how much FIFA have got their sh*t in order that the current format of the tournament is the longest used by a mile. That of course was until FIFA went too far again and, in the pursuit of more votes from the Football Associations and money from the sponsors that would both benefit from more teams being in the tournament, decided that we would see an expansion to 48 teams in 2026.

It's not just FIFA that are at it. What the hell was that England squad announcement video yesterday? At first I thought, "Hmmmm, this is quite cool and different..." but then it turned into, "What's wrong with a good old fashioned list submitted to the press, which can then be read out?" It just feels like everyone is trying to "out-market" eachother.

I think what I'm saying is that I'd like the World Cup to be on a loop of 1986 to 94; with that 24 team format that we're now using for the European Championship (see I resisted the urge to call it the "European World Cup")! Can we do that...?

You Come At The Kings, You Best Not Miss...

You'd think that this would be the case with the reigning World Champions, but in most cases World Title defences go out with a damp squib. In fact only two sides have successfully defended the World Cup and only one other has made the final.

So what has happened when people have Come At The Kings?

Well 1934 wasn't a great start! You've got to at least turn up if you want to defend the title. I can understand the South Americans not turning up in 38 when the tournament was held in Europe again but Uruguay should really have at least tried to go to Italy!

Their argument was that the Europeans had stayed away in 1930 so they were going to do the same, but the Belgians, Romanians, French and Yugoslavs had made that journey. The US travelled across the Atlantic to get pumped 7-1 by the hosts in a one off Knockout game! "Thanks for coming! Close the door on your way out...!" That's actually not 100% accurate. The Americans actually played Mexico in a one off qualifier in Rome  days before the tournament. So they at least played two games (unlike the poor Mexicans), even if they were sent home early in no uncertain terms. Poor form Uruguay!

1938 is one of the two occasions where the holders actually showed their supremacy. The Italians came through another straight knockout tournament in Europe. You can bet your life no Uruguayans went and got their passports renewed in preperation, same went for Argentina. They were outraged that the tournament hadn't gone back to South America. Of course Brazil were there, haplessly conspiring to ruin their chances of winning the things; resting the tournament's star player in the Semi Final at a time that there were no substitutes.

Any chance of the Italians coming out fighting in 1950 were hampered by two things. War (What's it good for? Absolutely nothing! Say it again...)*, which denied Argentina the right to host the tournament in 1942, not sure they'd have been up for the boat trip anyway considering general aversion to crossing the Atlantic back then. What's wrong with you guys?! Forget the 6 week journey, it's a World Cup! You can be a part of history! Think Barry Davies, Mexico 86, They think it's all over and all that...!

The second factor being the Superga Air Crash, which killed Il Grande Torino, the legendary Torino side who one back to back titles for 5 years straight; and made up the majority of the Italian national team. As a result of the tragedy, the reigning champs, who became the first to actually bother coming to the other side of the world to defend the World Cup, travelled by boat (Dennis Bergkamp style) while the rest of the competitors flew. And were knackered and relatively unfit by the time they arrived in Braaaaaasiw.

1954 saw the first proper attempt at a defence of the title from the Champs. I say this because by that point everybody had started to get the World Cup bug, I mean we were still a few years away from Barry Davies and BBC goal of the Tournament competitions set to naff (but nostalgically warming) soundtracks and graphics, but England were playing! And people were flying and resultantly prepared to cross the Atlantic.

Uruguay, the other half of the duopoly that dominated the World Cup when it came to actually winning the trophy (and not resting your best player in the Semi, declaring yourselves Champions prematurely or annexing your neighbours and trying to ride their coat tails or just not turning up because you think it's all beneath you), made it to the Quarter Finals dispatching of us along the way.

The only real thing to note from their title defence is their ill tempered defeat, later dubbed "The Battle of Bern" in which they were eliminated by the team considered the best in the World at the time, eventual losing finalists Hungary. Apparently tempers boiled over so much that a brawl kicked off in the tunnel and the changing rooms after the match, with the police having to step in.

I actually don't know much of what happened to the Germans in 1958. If memory serves me correctly they came 4th and Juste Fontaine scored 73 goals against them in the playoff (may have been 4). West Germany became the first team other than Uruguay and Italy to win the World Cup when they beat the Hungarians in the rain in Switzerland four years earlier. They couldn't repeat the feat in Sweden  probably partly down to the fact that they hadn't become the fearsome footballing nation that we are all familiar with nowadays (obviously there were no penalties back then either).

In Chile in 1962, one of the most seemingly mundane World Cups in my opinion (obviously after Italia 90, nothing was as drab as the penalty shoot out fest that was Italia 90), Braaaaaasiw unremarkably became the second, and last, team to successfully defend their title. And did it without Pele, one of the many reasons why I think Maradona was better (but that's for another day). Instead they had the goat sh*gging, mother in law killing, alcoholic, genius that was Garrincha to thank.

By 1966 Garrincha was on the decline and Pele had bottled it on the big stage again! I jest (again). As a result the Braaaaaasiwians (that's probably what Roy Hodgson actually calls them) were unceremoniously dumped out of the competition in the first round.

In the technicolor Mexican sun it was our turn to defend the trophy. And we did so without any hiccups, hence we now have two stars above our badge... If only!

What actually happened was our Captain got arrested for jewellery theft and our striker was carried off of an aeroplane on suspicion of being blind drunk on the eve of the tournament. Then our manager offended the locals, our best goalkeeper got food poisoning and his replacement had a howler a quarter final where we surrendered a 2 goal lead and were knocked out. Pretty successful campaign if you ask me!

If you think that was bad, Braaaaaasiw went from being that famous, "Here comes Carlos Alberto on the right...!" team in 1970 to a replica of Billy Bremner's Leeds side of the 70s, four years later in West Germany. I suppose they did still field a slightly overweight looking Rivelinho, but as you can imagine it wasn't the same. The mantle of "Entertainers" was passed on to Johan Cruyff's Dutch side.

In Argentina West Germany were apparently shockingly bad. Although they still made the second group stage, OBVIOUSLY. A bad German side is the equivalent of a good every other nation, while unspectacular it wasn't the worst title defence ever.

Argentina also disappointed four years later in Spain, despite having a young Diego Maradona in the side (the actual GOAT**). One thing that I hadn't appreciated, being 1 at the time of the tournament (don't worry I'm not going to start that again) was that the television station at the time refused to air the opening game of the tournament between the Champs Argentina and Belgium. Which the Argentinians failed to win (is it "Argentinians" or "Argentines"?).

Turns out Maradona's lot weren't so great away from South America, without President Vidiela paying opposing players a visit before key games. The Argentines/Argentinians had a stinker in 82 eventually limping out in the second group stage, with Maradona being sent off in a key game for retaliation to some of the "special attention" he'd been receiving from opposing defenders. This did at least set up the showdown of the tournament between the free scoring  free flowing Braaaaaasiw and the pragmatic slow starters (TM) Italy,  which the Italian's (or is it Italianians, kidding) eventually won. Probably the last we'd see of that young upstart Maradona...

From what I've seen we should always host the World Cup in North or Central America. 1970 looked great; 94 was/is my favourite tournament, bar the final; and 1986, the competition's second visit to Mexico, was an excellent colourful tournament full of exciting players and teams. Except for the holders the Italianians! So much so that I can barely remember what happened to them in the Mexican heat, it was that underwhelming!

From what I recall there was a game against South Korea? That might have been the tournament opener? And there was a game against the Argentine/Argentinians. Then they were eventually eliminated by the French (reigning European World Cup Champions of the Galaxy) in the second round. They'd have had to play Braaaaaasiw in the Quarter Finals anyway ...

Come 1990 the jig was well and truly up for Maradona and Argentina. Considering this was the first World Cup I watched, I can remember being thoroughly disappointed with them from the moment Benjamin Messing lost his boot trying to kick Caniggia into a pulp; through scraping past the USSR (they'd have gone out in the groups had it been the current 32 team format); Maradona's one moment of genius in the game against Braaaaaasiw, amid rumours that they drugged Branco; the penalties that saw off both the Yugoslavianians (I'm messing) and Italy; and that final! The worst World Cup final I've seen (and bear in mind all of the others that I didn't see live seemed to have been better).

But believe it or not, it would turn out that Argentina in 1990 aren't even the worst Champs I've seen in the 8 tournaments I've watched!

Germany weren't great in 1994. But then they're Germany, so that equated to a quarter final exit! Klinsmann did score a quality volley that he set up for himself against South Korea and they did take part in an entertaining 2nd round win over Belgium, which I missed because I was at Butlins (that's another story for another day). But Germany only put up slightly more of a fight than Argentina had 4 years earlier.

Braaaaaasiw in 1998 were probably the best ever reigning champions I've witnessed. For a start they had that Nike advert in the airport, that was worth a Semi Final place on its own. In all seriousness though  they were powered by the best player in the world at the time. Kids imagine Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo actually turned up at a big tournament and replicated what they do to Leganes and Sporting Hee Haw against decent teams... That's Ronaldo in 1998! The man was unstoppable! Except for the whole having a seizure hours before the final.

People talk about Zidane at France 98 but the reality was he only really stood out in the final. The French team is revered in hindsight, whereas Braaaaaasiw were feared, even Denilson!

We got to see the real France in Korea/Japan. Heavily reliant on an injured, and now probably the best in the world, Zidane. For me the best France team I've seen at the World Cup was the 06 lot, who basically tuned up for one last hurrah and came very close to winning the thing. The 02 iteration of the side didn't come near their level, despite being World and European World Cup of the Solar System & Galaxy Champions (I really need to stop with that joke  its been six years!).

Have you ever watched Every Which Way But Loose? Quick synopsis, if you never had ITV during the 1990s. Clint Eastwood is this Street Fighting Prize Fighter who gets his head turned by a pretty country singer he meets in a bar, while he's travelling the country in search of a fight with this legendary street fighter called "Tank Murdoch". At the end of the film he finally gets his fight with a very washed up and out of shape "Tank" but he loses to him, despite dominating the fight, either because the girl is in his head or because he sees that beating "Tank Murdoch" will send him down a similar path as the washed up folk legend that's he's pummelling... Brazil in 2006 were Tank Murdoch!

As much as I love Ronaldo (he's my joint favourite player of all time with Maradona), he just wasn't the electric forward that we saw in 98 or the the lethal finisher that bagged eight in 2002. He kind of walked around the pitch with his hands on his hips, looking like he was in the sort of shape I'd be in if chucked on to a field of Professional Footballers aged 28 (still managed to score this CLASSIC Ronaldo goal against Ghana in the last 16).

Then you had Ronaldinho, he'd graced 02 as part of the "3 R's" attack and was coming off the back of a monster season with Barcelona where he'd won the Champions League and been applauded at the Bernebau after taking Real Madrid apart. But 2006 looked a tournament too much for him despite the bucktoothed, Jerry Curled maestro only being 25/26 at the time.

Roberto Carlos lacked the agility to be as cavalier as he had been in the last two tournaments, and ended up looking like a lost fullback in a pub team (Especially in the defeat against France)! Even Adriano, who was given a shot power of 138,262,937 out of 99 on that year's Pro Evolution soccer disappointed.

It was a sad end to an era of Braaaaaasiwian dominance that had effectively lasted 12 years from the Romario/Bebeto team that was successful in the US.

If Braaaaaasiw were bad I'm not sure what adjective I'd use to describe the next two title defenses that were to come. Granted the Italians in 2010 were unlucky to lose Buffon to injury but they still should have qualified from a group containing Paraguay, New Zealand and Slovakia. The Italian's only achievement of note was a lovely chipped finish from Quagliarella in a frantic 3-2 defeat to the Slovakians. That and their reaffirmation of the "slow starting Italy" stereotype that is lazily rolled out by every pundit on UK television (at least we won't hear that one this year).

Finally we have Spain. Who'd have thought they would have continued trend that has seen 3 of the last 4 World Champions perish in the Group Stage of the following tournament. I blame their signing up of the Diego Costa, a man I recently (correctly) proclaimed to be the King of Shithousery, for a tournament which was to be held in his country of birth (I mean even that is trolling in my eyes)! Things rapidly went down hill for the Spanish (or is it Spaniards ...) and they found themselves dethroned after just two games, much to the delight of that old dude (who I'm assuming was Braaaaaasiwian) with the "Adios Spana" sign. Was that written on a tablet or did I imagine that? If it was, what a time to be alive!

I think what my ramblings will teach you is that one tournament's champion is so often another's laughing stock. Be it washed up has beens, cocky trolls or a bunch of Joga Bontians turned into Stoke! Four years is a long time, especially in a sport so heavily reliant on athleticism and current mental state. Look out Germany...!


*I jest, briefly. As someone with a history degree who has studied the first and second world wars, their causes and effects I'm conscious of trivialising them!

**See I'm down with the kids!

The Final Countdown

There you go, we have our final 32. 3 years of blood and sweat. Over 150 nations whittled down to just 32.

Now we look forward June (well December first, when we find out who plays who). To Russia! To the return of the greatest sporting event in the world!

Before we do that I feel like we should all shed a tear.

We should shed a tear for Fabbio Grosso and Marco Tardelli wheeling away in what almost always seems like slow motion. For Roberto Baggio's run against the Czechs in 1990 and his last gasp goal against Nigeria in 94

Shed a tear for Johan Cruyff absolutely bamboozling that Swedish right back, for Arie Haan repeatedly scoring from 30+ yards like it was an every day occurance. For the ball beautifully pulled down by Bergkamp and Dirk Nanninger bundling through the Argentinedefence.

Shed a tear Archie Gemmill dancing through the Dutch defence, even if it was too little too late. For David Nairey's belter that stirred the best side not to win the World Cup into life. For Müller scoring past Leighton from that ridiculous angle (if only Costa Rica had been different)*. For Strachan struggling to jump over the advertising hoardings.

Shed a tear for Brian McBride's crazy diving header. Eric Wynalda's free kick indoors. For stunning England in 1950.

Shed a tear for Roger Miller dancing in the corner after nicking the ball from Renne Higuita. For Benjamin Messing losing his boot trying to mame Caniggia. For Pierre Njanka going on that run against Austria.

Shed a tear for those Dance routines! For Asamoah Gyan (wearing number 3?! You're not a left back) and Kevin Prince Boateng stunning the Germans. For the heartbreak of missing that last minute penalty against Uruguay, which would have seen an African team make a semi final.

Shed a tear Gerry Armstrong blasting through Arkanada's legs. For the defence allowing Josimar to score THAT goal.

Shed a tear for Ray Houghton in the Giants Stadium. John Aldridge just trying to get a little water on in the heat. For O'Leary's penalty in Genoa and Robbie Keane's forward roll against the Germans. And for Roy walking out because you didn't even have bibs!

Shed a tear for sneaking into the second round to play COSTA RICA?!? Wait? How did that happen? 2004 couldn't happen again could it...? No!

Shed a tear for high energy football. Smashing the bar in extra time against Brazil. For faking an injury to try and get Brazil thrown out in qualifying (maybe not for that).

Shed a tear for going out unbeaten, despite being in a group with the reigning champions. For Winston Reid!

Actually don't shed anything. As stated before most of these guys had 2-3 years to get their sh*t in order. Time, and football, waits for no man. Hopefully lessons will be learnt and we'll see some of them in four years...

*Why do Scotland always draw either Brazil or Holland?? 

Supposed I'd better finish this

Posting every week was always gonna be tough. I mean, I'm no journo. I have a full time job, and other interests that take up my time. AND I've never even been into writing. In short it's a miracle that I even update this blog a few times a year. In my excitement for the the upcoming World Cup I started off at 100 miles an hour, posting like clockwork, every Sunday. Then it all fell flat. I was due to post two Sundays ago but I left it until the Bank Holiday. Then on the Bank Holiday I decided to leave it until the Tuesday. Then... Nothing. Then a week had passed and I was late. And now I'm here. Posting again. Two weeks late. It may not be as big a post as some of the others but I feel like it's my duty to share my excitement and impart some of my geekiness upon you all.

So what's been happening?

"Dr Charlton will see you..."

Luis Suarez is injured and has had an operation on his knee. But it's ok though, he'll be fit in time to play a significant part in the World Cup. The Uruguayan FA have confirmed this. Dr Francescoli has done a good job. I know what you folks in the know are thinking, I thought it as soon as I saw the name, "What a coincidence that the Dr that operated on him shares the same surname as one of Uruguay's greatest ever players Enzo Francescoli..." Well I've got news for you, it's his brother. Yep! That's right. Enzo Francescoli's brother performed surgery on Luis Suarez's knee. It's the equivalent of say Jack Charlton performing Wayne Rooney's hair transplant (he's gonna need as much hair on that meat head of his as possible in that Brazilian sun, that dude is not made for hot weather).

Speaking of injuries, a Ghanaian Witchdoctor claims he is behind Cristiano Ronaldo's recent injury problems. The best quote in the story for me was, "...I am very serious about it. Last week, I went around looking for four dogs and I got them to be used in manufacturing a special spirit called Kahwiri Kapam...." What the hell has that man done with those poor dogs??

Elsewhere the Germans are steadily undoing the good work that they have done in the last few years to put themselves up there as front runners for this year's tournament. Firstly, half the team are injured. But they can't really be blamed for that. Then, this they can be blamed for, a few of the players attend a sponsor's event (Mercedes) where they take part in a touring "race" with some professional drivers but they crash, injuring a spectator! On top of that Kevin Grosskreutz has been in trouble for WEEING IN A HOTEL LOBBY and on another occasion throwing a kebab at Cologne fans.

Meanwhile at England's hotel they've thrown away a ton of out to date food that I'm assuming they had been planning to feed to their guests. There goes our excuse for another clueless performance at a major competition...

In terms of our World Cup history lesson we were up to 1978 when I last finished off. We're now in territory where you may well have been born so I shall stop referring to sh*t that happened before we were born (I wasn't born until 1980 by the way so technically 1978 falls into that category).

1978
When I was younger I always wished I'd been around and old enough to have watched the 1978 World Cup. Mainly because of the images of the two teams coming out in the final to a load of blue and white tickertape. Now I'm a little older, I'm not so fussed about the whole thing. It all looks a bit dark and cold (to be fair it was held during the Argentinian winter), but as well as being literally dark the tournament had a metaphorical shade of darkness to it. Argentina (it was held in Argentina by the way, I keep forgetting to mention who the hosts of these tournaments are) was in the grip of a military dictatorship at the time. Thousands of civilians had gone missing, suspectedly at the hands of the government and even the main guy on the organising committee was killed a couple of years before the tournament (and you thought Qatar was dodgy).

As a result of the political situation in Argentina, Johan Cruyff, star of the tournament 4 years earlier, refused to participate in the tournament. On top of that, the circumstances upon which Argentina made it to the final were very suspicious; I'll talk about that in a second. Before we get to the final and 2nd round group stage shenanigans I'll start at the beginning. We, England, didn't qualify in 1978 (we didn't qualify in 74 either), Scotland did though. They were the British Isles' only representative in both the 1974 and 1978 World Cups, and they didn't disappoint! When I say that I mean they did actually disappoint performance wise. Oh in terms of performance Scotland disappointed a lot of people (most of them Scotch, I'd imagine).

Up until 1978 Scotland had qualified for 3 World Cup finals tournaments (1954, 1958 and 1974) and never made it past the 1st round, to this date their record stands at 8 tournaments 8 first round exits. For some reason, in 1978 the Scots, well their manager, thought they could win the whole thing. Now don't get me wrong, this wasn't the Scotland of 2014. They were decent and they could probably have got to the 2nd round with a little more good fortune back then, but winners?

So they release a song about how they're going to win the World Cup (you HAVE to listen to this) but then turn up and lose to Peru and draw with Iran. By this point, sponsors are tearing up agreements, fans are chucking bricks through the FA's windows and the whole campaign is just a bit of a mess. Then just when you feel it's going to get even worse, when they face 1974 runners up (and eventual finalists) Holland in their last group match; they win 3-2, which still sees them eliminated on goal difference, and score one of the best goals scored by a player from the British Isles at the World Cup in the process.

The whole thing was thoroughly entertaining. If by any chance you're interested is reading the full story in detail, I recommend the following link.

Such a motivational speaker

Scotland aside, Holland make the final again. And are beaten by the host nation AGAIN. The tournament has a first round, with four groups of four teams, which then moves into a second round of two groups of the four top two teams from the first round groups. You follow, right?

As Germany and Austria hadn't cheated Algeria yet (we'll get to that in a sec), there was no concept of playing deciding group or league games at the same time at the World Cup or in football in general. So the in the last game of their 2nd round group Argentina know that if they don't beat Peru by at least 4 goals, Brazil will make it to the final at their expense, as the Brazilians had already played their last game earlier that day. Just to clear things up, Peru were no mugs back in 1978 (ask Scotland), they'd won the 1975 Copa America (the South American World Cup ;-)).

But Argentina had a couple of aces up their sleeves... Firstly, the Peruvian goalkeeper was actually born in Argentina. Ok so that doesn't mean that anything untoward happened. I can hear you saying, "So what Travis?" But it didn't stop there. Just to make sure the Peruvians knew the score, El Presidente turned up before the game in their dressing room to give a speech emphasising the "Brotherhood" that should exist between the two nations. Argentina then went on a beat the 1975 Copa America winners 6-0, as you do...

In the final, Argentina beat Holland (minus Cruyff) 3-1 in extra time. The main points to take from it were as follows. Big row at the beginning about a Dutch player's plaster cast on his arm. Kempes, Argentina's hero in the tournament, scores. Holland equalise in the last ten minutes, then hit the post right at the end (oh, what might have been). Kempes bundles one in in extra time then another fella scores (can't remember his name) but by that point the Dutch had given up. The military government loves this all and uses it as part of their propaganda machine, they would stay in power until 1983 (I think it was 83, if I'm wrong I'm sorry, my Argentine history isn't the greatest).

1982
So this was the first World Cup after I was born and it was held in Spain (see, I remembered to tell you). 1982 was a time of change in terms of the World Cup, 24 teams were allowed to qualify instead of the 16 that had qualified from 1954 to 1978. England were back! We qualified for the first time in 12 years (we actually qualified for the first time in 20 years, we automatically qualified in 66 as hosts, and 70 as holders) and went out in the 2nd round despite not actually losing a game (stupid Kevin Keegan missing that header).

Italy gave all lazy pundits who haven't bothered watching them another stereotypical piece of "analysis", on top of calling them "defensive", to use for years to come, by starting the tournament slowly and eventually winning it (I've only seen Italy start one other tournament slowly, that being the 94 World Cup). I think I'm correct in saying, they didn't win a match until the 2nd round.

1982 was all about Brazil though, ask anybody over the age of 45, who the best team they've ever seen at a World Cup is and they'll invariably say that 1982 Brazilian team. I've already posted a link to the Eder's goal against the USSR (here it is again), on top of that there was Zico's free kick against Scotland, Eder's free kick against Argentina (technically Eder scored it) and this ridiculous move that led to Socrates (what a name) scoring against Italy. Pretty much every game they played featured a spectacular goal. However, with the exception of a 1st round group match against New Zealand, every game they played also featured something else. The opposition scoring. Often first too. Brazil had to come back from behind against the USSR and Scotland (who obviously went out in the first round) as well as twice against the Italians, who had decided to start winning matches instead of drawing them. But in their game against Italy they conceded one too many and ended up losing 3-2.

Germany got to the final against Italy but did so in unconvincing fashion. Firstly they had to cheat Algeria out of a place in the 2nd round by beating Austria 1-0. They'd previously lost to Algeria, both sides needed a German 1-0 win to go through on goals scored and their final game was played after the Algerians. As a result FIFA then introducd the rule that all last games of groups/leagues should be played simultaneously.

Just in case the Germans hadn't made enough enemies, their keeper almost killed (not an exaggeration) a French player in a semi final win that saw them come back from 3-1 down to win on penalties with a bicycle kick in extra time. Talk about drama.

In the final, Italy beat them 3-1 and were even able to afford to miss a penalty. The most memorable thing to happen in the game was Marco Tardelli's celebration for the 2nd goal. Oh and Dino Zoff became the oldest World Cup winner at 40 (he was their captain).

1986
It's widely believed that the 1986 World Cup was one of the best in the modern era. I still wasn't old enough to be that interested in proceedings (I was only 5). Couldn't have been that great if it couldn't tear me away from cartoons.

Stupid internet didn't have the photo! It' the one where he pulls his shirt over his face. This is the best I could find

Italy, the holders, weren't great in 1986. They got off to too slow a start and were a little too defensive... England started slowly, we made a meal out of a group containing Portugal (who weren't the same as the Figo/Ronaldo Portugals we're familiar with), Morocco and Poland. Ray Wilkins got sent off for throwing the ball at the ref, giving European Club Soccer on the SEGA Mega Drive, an image to use when you got knocked out (I can't find an example online!!!). And Bryan Ronbson dislocated his shoulder, that's what you get for such a blatant display of nepotism Bobby!* Gary Lineker saved us and scored five times to get us to the Quarter Finals and that kinda where things kicked off.

So in 1978 Argentina had this 17 year old kid who everyone had been raving about, but they leave him out of the squad. Didn't need him considering they had the Generalissimo giving "inspirational" talks to the opposition. Then in 1982 they take the wonder kid, now 21, but he gets kicked all over the place and eventually is sent off in a crucial game for lashing out. I'm talking about Diego Maradona, I'm assuming you've all heard of him, even the non-football fans. Maradona was the best footballer that has ever existed, in my eyes, and in 1986 he was nearing the height of his powers.

Argentina played England in the Quarter Finals in 1986. Maradona had already had a few moments in Argentina's first few games in the tournament but in the game against England he singled handedly decided the match and gave an incite into two characteristics that would continue to be displayed throughout his career. The first being his willingness to bend the rules. I'm sure you've all seen it. Maradona goes on a run the ball gets flicked into the air by a panicking England defender and he jumps and punches the ball past the keeper. The whole thing is pretty outrageous and I just can't see how he got away with it. Then comes the second characteristic. Sheer brilliance. If you've not seen the 2nd goal he scores or if you're too partisan to appreciate it, I pity you. Genuinely. It's up there with Eder's goal that I talked about further up the page. I'm not gonna describe it, you watch it!

After dumping us out Maradona did it again against Belgium in the Semis and Argentina were in the final. Meanwhile the Germans, like in 1982, were quietly making their way through the tournament. They beat France in the semis again (France had knocked a decent Brazilian team in the Quarter Finals) and met Argentina in probably the most dramatic World Cup final ever. Argentina go 2-0 up and everybody, bar their manager, thinks they've won the game; but the Germans come back to make it 2-2. Rumenigge scores and produces the least celebration that a goal in a World Cup final has ever produced. Does that sentence make sense? I dunno, just watch the goal.

But Maradona has the last laugh, he produces an amazing pass for Burrachga to score the winner, lifts the trophy and then sings a song saying that Argentina are going to win the World Cup and the press are sons of whores while half naked in the changing rooms. I suppose it was better, and more accurate, than Ally's Tartan Army...


*I'm aware Bryan and Bobby Robson weren't related, that was a joke!

What a difference four years make

Somebody tell 'Pops' it's not over 30s night!

Four Years is a long time. It's 1,461 days, 2 million 103 thousand 840 minutes (I used a calculator to work that out, I'm not that clever). As this blog post is about to reveal, it's the difference between being a fat dude derided by millions and a goal machine feared by all opponents. Leap years occur every four years because the earth drifts so much out of sync with time within that time frame that we need to correct this by adding another day to our calendars. Many sporting events occur in four year cycles; the Olympic Games, various non-footballing sports World Championships, the football European Championship and quite possible the greatest event of all, the football World Cup. Obviously the next few paragraphs will focus on this (those of you that aren't that interested in football might as well just jump to the last paragraph).

I'm not really sure as to why a four year gap was chosen between World Cups. Why not a number like five or ten? We tend to count in bases of five and ten due to the digits on our hands. Why not two years or even one? They probably didn't choose one or two due to the travel constraints back in 1930, or was the format determined by the fact that the Summer Olympics were separated by 4 year intervals (they definitely wouldn't have been able to travel as well back in 1896 or 1900). Regardless of the reasoning behind the World Cup occurring every four years the timing of the interval is perfect; soon enough that you're not left waiting too long but long enough for the footballing world to have evolved, meaning the outcome of the tournament can seldom be predicted.

For me the four year gap makes the World Cup something to cherish, the way I see it, and this may sound silly or even slightly morbid, I could be dead by the time of the next tournament. Either that or blind (imagine being blind during a World Cup, that would be the ultimate torture). As extreme as my suggestion above sounds an element of it does ring true, in fours years lives change, priorities change. So as far as I'm concerned I need to watch as many games as possible.

And just to justify my logic let's take a look at how much can change in 2,103,840 minutes through what I consider to be the ultimate barometer of quadrennial change, the World Cup itself.

This is Ronaldo

The first exhibit I'd like to refer to is my favourite footballer of all time, back in 2007 I found myself doing a bit of mental arithmetic in an attempt to establish whether he'd still be young enough to be considered for his country's 2010 World Cup squad. Alas he was barely fit for the side in 2006, come 2010 I'm not even sure he'd have fitted into a kit. The person I'm talking about is Ronaldo Luís Nazário de Lima or more commonly known as Ronaldo. The Ronaldo, you will never catch me referring to Christiano Ronaldo as "Ronaldo", in fact I judge people who do this. Ronaldo's performances over the course of his 12 year World Cup career are the perfect example of how much can change in four years. In 1994 (yeah, he was there) he never kicked a ball, I remember seeing him running off the bench at the final celebrating with the rest of the substitutes. A buck toothed 17 year old boy that I'd heard rumblings about but, what with the lack of YouTube, knew absolutely nothing about. In 1994 it was all about Romario (and to a lesser extend Bebeto), Brazil didn't require the services of Il Fenomeno.

In 1998 they most certainly did. After tearing up both the Dutch and Spanish leagues Ronaldo was now the main man. He wore the number 9 shirt that Romario had claimed four years earlier, god knows what shirt number he had in 1994 (not even I know and I'm normally up with sad facts like that). Romario was nowhere to be seen, he didn't even make the final 22 man squad (it was 22 rather than 23 back then just I case you think that's a typo), Bebeto somehow did though?!? In case you're totally new to this World Cup lark, I'll briefly fill you in. In 1998 a Ronaldo led Brazil got to the final against France, despite their defensive frailties, only for Ronaldo to have a seizure on the morning of the final. The whole experience proved too much for the Brazilians and the were easily swept aside, losing 3-0.

This guy ate Ronaldo

Four years later in Korea & Japan (2002 for anyone that can't do simple addition) Ronaldo basically took out his frustrations  from 1998 on the rest of the competition and became the first man to score more than 6 goals in a tournament since Lato in 1974 (he got 8). That's all you get regarding 2002. Ronaldo was a beast, Brazil won it, let's move on to Germany (2006). In 2006 the guy that turned up with the Brazilian team was not Il Fenomeno. He'd scored a couple in qualifying, he even wore the number 9 shirt, but the shirt was at least a size bigger than it had been in 2002 (if not, 2 sizes). For me 2006 was really sad, because it looked as if Brazil and Ronaldo were clinging on to former glories. Pundits and fans have continually mocked Ronaldo ever since and he's become known as "Fat Ronaldo" (even my girlfriend has referred to him as"Fat Ronaldo", sacrilege!!). The man who four years earlier achieved what no player had done in 24 years was now trotting around out of breath, looking like an old Sunday League player. So my dream that Ronaldo would suddenly shed a couple of stone and somehow end up fitter aged 33 in 2010 never did come true (shock). I'm now hoping that this year is four years too late for 35 year old (turning 36 on the eve of the tournament) Miroslav Klose, who is two goals away from breaking Ronaldo's record for the most goals in World Cup tournaments. Ronaldo deserves that record; please god, make Klose look like a pub footballer.

The real 'Golden Generation

In 2002 Italy should have won the world cup. Maybe "won" is a bold statement but they should have definitely got to say the Final. Evidence to back my bold statement up comes from their performance in 2006 when they did win the tournament, but that's not the basis for my statement. The conviction of my proclamation comes from the the side they the had on paper, Buffon, Maldini, Nesta, Canavarro, Gattuso, Totti, Del Piero, Vieri and Inzaghi. Ask any Italian to name the best of the Azzurri over say the last quarter of a century and the only players who may be able to trump the aforementioned names would be say Roberto Baggio, Baresi and maybe Pirlo. What I'm getting at is the 2002 squad contained a true "Golden Generation", and I'm not talking about those ridiculously false "Golden Generations" that England are supposed to have had at every world cup in the last 10 years (despite being above average, at best). These are some of the finest players to have played for the Italians in the last 20 plus years and they should have gone a lot further.

Being the saddo that I am, in the build up to this year's world cup, I've been watching highlights (genuinely highlights, not clips) of games from the world cup from about 1978 onwards. One of the things that has stood out for me that I probably didn't appreciate back in 2002 was that Italy were absolutely robbed against South Korea in the 2nd round. Had the internet and social media existed in the forms that they do nowadays (or had Italy been England), I don't think we'd have every heard the end of the fallout from that game. It was a joke, red cards, penalties, disallowed goals (and there were loads of em), it says a lot about the referee Byron Moreno that he was subsequently banned domestically for another questionable performance and then jailed for two and a half years for heroin smuggling. Anyway, I feel like I'm drifting away from the subject here, the point I'm trying to make is that Italy were robbed in 2002 but were, luckily for them, good enough to still win the tournament 4 years later in 2006 with many of the players that were part of the squad in Korea/Japan.

But then came 2010. In 2010 their luck ran out; those that remained from 2002 & 2006 were definitely past it and those that replaced the departed/retired squad members, just weren't good enough. Italy went from being a fairly expansive attacking (cleverly attacking) team in 2006, despite the lazy stereotypes, to a team clinging on in 2010, reaffirming the lazy defensive tag they're so often given. Struggling to two draws and a defeat in a fairly straightforward group containing Slovakia (it was Slovakia right? I always mix them up with Slovenia), New Zealand and Paraguay. It was like that bit at the end of Every Which Way But Loose where Clint Eastwood's character is battering the legendary fighter Tank Murdoch, who's just living off of his reputation. If you don't know what I'm talking about, and you probably don't, that film is so old my dad ALWAYS tells me the story of how it was the last thing he went to watch in the cinema, I suggest you watch it online somewhere (or wait for it to come on ITV late on a Wednesday night as it always does).

Italy became the 2nd team in the history of the world cup to crash out in the first round (Brazil being the first in 1966, although Uruguay went one better and refused to defend it in 1934*) in 2010. What a difference 4 years makes eh, you've got to make your chance count.

He hardly looks a fresh faced angel but compare this to the pic below

Another piece of evidence of the effects of a 4 year gap on the fortunes of both nations and individual player is the roller-coaster ride of a story that belongs to Diego Maradona and Argentina between 1978 and 1994. In 1978 Maradona was a slim (yeah slim, I should stop at that with this story he hasn't been slim since the early 1980's) promising teenage sensation in 1978 and was controversially left out of the world cup squad. Not that they needed him, they won it anyway, Mario Kempes, dodgy results against Peru, protesting about plaster casts and all that. In 1982 he was now in his early twenties. Everyone knew who he was but he wasn't quite the finished article yet, Italy famously shackling him in the 2nd round, so much so that he was eventually sent off for retaliating to the "special attention" he was receiving and Argentina crashed out.

You couldn't get a more chalk and cheese comparison from 1982 to 1986, despite the retention of the awful 80's graphics with all television broadcasts, including the little flashing "R" when you were watching a replay; just in case you mistook a replay of an incident as a case of you having a strong sense of deja vu. Maradona was amazing, he probably put in the greatest individual performance by a player at the world cup and Argentina romped home (yes he scored against us with his hand but he also scored at least two goals that tournament where ran past or even through half the opposition on his way to goal). In 1990 it was failure again for Argentina, they would have been out in the group stages had it not been for the 24 team format which enabled the best 3rd placed teams to sneak through to the 2nd round. They got through to the final courtesy of two penalty shoot outs and a magnificent assist from Maradona against Brazil but it wasn't the same, and Maradona was starting to look a lot less svelte. By 1994 Argentina were most certainly living off of their former glories, they were considered decent despite only qualifying via a play off (and a close play off if my memory serves me correctly) with Australia, who were not as strong as they are nowadays. Maradona provided another great assist for Caniggia against Nigeria (I'll leave you to Google that one) and scored a good goal against the Greeks but he would later fail a drugs test and the Argentines would crash out in the 2nd round against Romania.

The last football related contrast I want to talk about is that of Brazil between 1970 and 1974. I know they got to the 2nd round and I think could have mathematically made the final at one point but this is Brazil. Like Germany, getting far in a world cup means next to nothing to them and this side was following up from the performances of the side that many often romanticise about being the best ever. Just as with the Italians of 2002 I can reel off the names in the 1970 Brazillian team, despite the tournament occurring 10 and a half years before I was even born, Pele, Jairzinho, Tostao, Clodolado, Gerson, Carlos Alberto and Rivelinho. Rivelinho sticks out the most for me when I think of the difference between the side in 1970 and 1974, the main reason being that he's the only name from the 1970 side, that I know of, that played in 1974. For me what doesn't help Rivelinho is the way he looks. In 1970 he and rest of the gang were exciting and the football was free flowing. Come 1974 it was all a bit uglier and Rivelinho himself had kinda the look of that old guy in a nightclub, the one with his first 4 shirt buttons undone, showing off his medallion, a good few years older than all of the other club goers (or in this case, his Brazilian team-mates) and just that little bit out of fashion. That's what 1974 did to my image of Rivelinho. As I said before, what a difference 4 year make.

And then there's me. Every world cup my life is significantly different than it was at the last one. In 1990 I was a 9 year old boy, in awe of the whole thing. USA 94 saw a young teenager dazzled by the colour of it all, fighting to stay up and watch the midnight kick-offs. Come 1998 in France I'd found pubs and Alcohol, one of my lasting memories being watching the Brazil v Denmark quarter final in one of the few pubs in Enfield that you could regularly go to as a 17 year old without getting ID'd. By 2002 I'd just finished uni, I was basically a lay about, struggling to wake up to watch games that kicked off at 7am. 2006 was the first world cup I experienced while in full time employment, I didn't enjoy that. Missing afternoon games is not my thing! In 2010 I had my own place and was married, if I'm being honest I wasn't massively happy with my life. It is of no surprise that of all the world cups I've watched 2010 is the one I struggle to recall the most despite being the most recent. And now there's 2014. My life has completely changed direction for the better and I love it! I'm in a great place in 2014 and I feel like this year I'm going to have a great world cup (listen to me talking like I'm playing in it or something). In my head 2014 is going to be the tournament that 2010 could never be and no matter what happens in the 30 or so days after June the 12th I know that it'll be totally different to what I've ever experienced and nothing like anything that happens in the future.

What a difference four years make!

*Did they think it was going to be hosted in Uruguay/South America every year or something??