10 Things: Week 6 - 10 things that irk me about having a West Ham season ticket

I've been away in Ibiza for the best part of two weeks, I'm tired, I've put on weight from all the boozing & junk food, I've spent more money than Manchester City, or should I say PSG (apologies to Twitter followers and Facebook friends, I know I've tried that one out on you a week or so ago), and now I'm back. Just before I went I began the renewal process for my West Ham season ticket, I came home to find all the relevant paperwork returned with some 'i's to dot and 't's to cross (man I hate that phrase, only morons say that, same for "chillax"). The whole thing got me thinking as to what a palaver it is following your team to this extent, here's 10 reasons why...

It costs £600
And that's the cheapest ticket they do! Last year it was £530 for 23 games, this year it's gone up by £70 but we have 4 less games. And if you think about it, we'll probably win circa 6 home games next year so in essence I'm paying about £100 per victory. I wish it was cheaper!

West Ham couldn't organise a gathering where they were serving alcoholic drinks, even if it were in an establishment that's sole purpose was to brew alcohol
So I submit my form a week or so before I go away, knowing the deadline for applications passes while I'm out of the country, however I'm bombarded with texts and emails telling me how time is running out for me to renew?? But I have renewed, or have I? Has it got lost in the post? Has my application for finance been rejected (I'm not paying £600 in one go)? Will I only be notified of my failure to successfully renew after I've left the country and therefore when I'm powerless to do anything before the deadline? After a around 40 mins on hold to the ticket office call centre (I got cut off once in that time), something I wished to avoid, hence I applied via post; I discover they just bombard everyone, even if the application has gone through. Great! Cheers West Ham!

It's like buying a lottery ticket and choosing your own specific numbers, you can never stop!
So I have my seat, and it's with my mates and in an area where I know everyone. I'm not saying for a second that I've planner to stop going to West Ham, but if for whatever reason there is a season where I don't wish to renew (whether it be for financial or fed up of watching your team get pummelled reasons) I'm screwed. I'll lose my seat. The thought of this unsettles me somewhat.

Going to games takes up most of my day
I leave at about 1 o'clock on a Saturday and get back at about 6:30 in the afternoon. That's a large chunk of one of my two days off a week!

There's going to be midweek games
Not as many as in the Championship, they literally play whenever they can find a spare 90 minutes, but the whole rushing there from work and getting home at 10:30-11:00 bothers me too.

People tend to do stuff at times or on days when West Ham are playing
Within the first month of the season I have a clash with a birthday celebration and a wedding. I hate having to check the fixture list every time somebody mentions a gathering on a weekend.

If friends or family want to come to a game they can't sit with us
Where I sit, it's all season ticket holders. Every so often I have a mate or someone who wants to come and watch a game with me but that's only possible if one of my mates who has a season ticket doesn't come. Grrr!

I AM NOT this guy!

People who don't like/understand football assume you're some sort of West Ham nut job just because you have a season ticket
I'm not that fella from Portsmouth with the crazy hair and tatoos! I don't wanna change my middle name to "West Ham" or "WHUFC"! I don't wanna name my kids after Bobby Moore & Trevor Brooking (even if they're girls)! I wouldn't have a West Ham themed wedding or birthday party or batmitzvah! I just want to see my team play regularly for the most cost effective price.

It gets cold in the winter
I am not looking forward to standing with a -1 wind blowing on me whilst bemoaning Carlton Cole for his failure to hold the ball up or having random Stoke fans point at me and do the w*nker hand gesture.

Nobody cares Stevie G!

I'll miss other decent games or sports that on TV
West Ham always seem to play at home when there's a Grand Slam Sunday. The Premier League should consider that I may want to see Man City v Man Utd rather than West Ham v Wigan (that had better not actually be a fixture clash) and I will not be happy if I miss the Cup Semi Finals or even Final! I don't care about the Carling Cup final though, nobody does unless they're in it!

Can I just say, I love having my season ticket. I will not be getting rid of it any time soon!

The view from my seat

Update

Congrats, but don't get carried away

I know I've not been on here for over a week now, I've been kinda busy. Just want to say congrats to Spain on Winning the inaugural European World Cup (yep I'm continuing the joke), lets see if they can defend it in 4 years time. See that's how you praise them! I think everyone is getting a little excited and carried away, proclaiming them as the greatest team ever. Yes they've won three competitions on the bounce but so did Uruguay in the 1920's/30's and the Italian side of the mid to late 30's might have done the same had the European World Cup been invented back then, the Brazillians of the late 90's/early 00's would have probably won three World Cups had Ronaldo not had a fit in the preparation for the 1998 final... The point I'm trying to make is, let's not get carried away, lets just appreciate Spain for what they are, a good football team, let's stop "sucking them off" (for want of a better phrase). They've been fortunate at times as have others been unfortunate, this not to take anything away from them but I'd say Germany were the most impressive team this year, they had an off 60 minutes (just as Spain did against Switzerland in their first game of the last World Cup) and were caught out. Italy were well beaten in the final but nobody seems to remember that they played the best part of half an hour with 10 men due to an unfortunate injury to Thiago Motta. England were... nah I'm kidding! England were dog poo as usual and everyone got excited despite constantly saying, "we're not getting excited this year", I mean can you believe there were people who thought we could match up to the likes of Italy?? We ended up putting in an embarrassing performance, it's not surprise we lost the penalty shoot out the players were knackered from spending 100+ minutes chasing Andrea Pirlo and co.

My final thoughts on Euro 2012, a thoroughly entertaining tournament the likes of which I haven't seen for a VERY long time. Let's hope the 2014 World Cup is just as good.

Best player: Andrea Pirlo, the only person who wasn't Spanish to come out of the tournament getting "sucked off" (sorry) by the press over here. It's liken they'd never heard of him, despite him being a World Cup winner, the wrong side of 30, playing for the current Italian champions... lazy journalism!

Worst player: Georgious Samaras. Wow! He was shocking. In the BBC closing montage they had a slo-mo of another Greek player shouting at him, I thought that was quite apt as I can imagine he'd have been pretty frustrating to play with. He did get on the scoresheet against the Germans though, I believe that puts him on 5 for the season. Yes! Five!! From a forward!

Best goal: Blaszczykowski's equaliser for Poland against Russia, great strike, apologies for Mick McCarthy's drab Northern accent.

Best Game: Not sure? The opener was pretty entertaining what with two red cards, a penalty save and a host of jokes regarding Greek instability & Poland's right wing element (this stuff writes itself sometimes).

Worst Game: Spain v Portugal, snoozeville. See they're not all flair and "Tika Taka"

Best Celebration: There weren't many or any unusual celebrations so I'll have to go with Balotelli's shirt off flex

Best Team: Germany, in my opinion. But that is closely followed by Spain. The best team doesn't always win!

Worst Team: Ireland, see Samaras. He scored as many as they did!

Best name: "You're a Czech!!" (Jiracek)

Best Look-a-like: Manuel Neuer looks a man from a Nazi propaganda poster or like he'd be on the East German team in Cool Runnings.

Hey, Jamaica! Watch out for Number Twelve turn. Scary, jaah?

Other notable mentions: Can we stop playing music after a goal is scored please UEFA? It's not clever. It's what teams from up north that have half empty stadiums do. We also do not need a pretentious overhead gradually zooming in, camera shot of every kick off. Nor do we need a countdown to kick off, the referee's whistle is sufficient. And goal line technology?!? Pfft, how many more times do I have to say it, Penalty or Goal, it worked when I was a kid.

So that's it, 31 games, 76 goals, 3 penalties, 3 red cars, 2 penalty shootouts and another drab performance from England and we're back where we began, Spain are still the champions of Europe. On to the David Beckhamless Olympic football tournament (Oh, the outrage! *rolls eyes*), which I will be attending. But before that I've got 10 days in Ibiza so don't expect to hear much from me at least until the 18th or so...

Check out these.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xrzg3a_itv-euro-2012-tournament-closing-montage_sport
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/18668987