I'm a World Cup addict.
I've probably mentioned it on here before.
I can identify most World Cups, barring say 1930-38 when it's all a bit grainy, from either still or video footage.
I've done every quiz going and can identify when the likes of Haiti, Zaire, Israel, Cuba and Iraq made their sole appearances.
I have a social blackout during the World Cup (this is genuinely true, ask my Wife if you know her), where I will almost certainly refuse to attend social event during a tournament, no matter how seemingly important. See the title of my blog...
I've taught my eldest Son, who appears to be pretty interested the story of the World Cup from 1930 up to 1974 at present, on our walk to school in the morning. He can explain the significance of the Maracanazo, to the point that he knows THE GAME WAS NOT A FINAL (it irks me when people call it that), and he knows that Pele watched his dad crying that day and vowed to win him the tournament when he grew up.
I've even tried to explain the likes of Garrincha and Maradona in the most PG way possible, although his learning hasn't reached the 1980's so we've only briefly touched on Maradona.
I'm f**king obsessed! And as a result will almost certainly be watching this year's tournament, in spite of the glaringly bad human rights abuses happening in Qatar to make it happen. I'm sorry. I fully understand that it makes me an absolute hypocrite, cos if you follow me on Twitter you'll see that I'm all fairness and equality, but even heroes have flaws... OK I'm not a hero, unless you need someone to explain the Adidas' role in enabling the West German side to win the 1954 final against the much fancied Hungarians in a downpour i.e. "Fritz Walter weather". Then I'm a hero!
In all seriousness though, I genuinely totally get it. But it's my one vice in life. I genuinely think I could give up watching West Ham, and yes it would be a struggle, but I couldn't the World Cup or it's little brother/sister the European Championship. I can't even bring myself to say the phrase "The Euros" *insert vomit emoji*.
Long and short is I will be watching this year, as I've done every summer from 1990 up until 2018. But that's the problem; or another, granted way more trivial, problem. It should be on now!
We should be at the back end of the tournament now. Somewhere around the Semi-Finals or Quarter-Finals depending on the edition. I'm thinking it'd be Semi-Finals, potentially even finished if we're talking Mexico 86 or Korea/Japan 02 which both started around the end of May. But Quarter-Finals if we're looking at something like USA 94, which started deeper into the latter part of June!
That's how much of a f**king geek (loser) I am. And that's how much I'm missing this year's tournament.
We should be watching Brazil abjectly crash out at the hands of a more organised European foe at this point, posing the question as to whether anyone outside of Europe will ever challenge our giants again.
Speaking of outside of Europe, statistically this would be where you see the last remaining African side knocked out of the competition. Full of patronising praise from the commentary teams and with stars destined for big money moves to Bolton, or whoever are mid noughties Bolton now, which invariably won't work out.
We should be watching the Germans steadily making their way towards the Semis, last tournament aside.
And the English, either out early or alongside their European neighbours, surrounded by a lack of self awareness and hubris from within the nation that doesn't see how bad we've been in any case (and I include 1990 and 2018 in that by the way, happy to debate anyone).
We should be watching a World Cup!
But we're not thanks to FIFA's greed so I'm going to watch the Women's Euros 🤮from tomorrow onwards. And you should too!
